Valentine’s Day can be sneaky.
You’re going about your day and suddenly there are hearts and boxes of chocolates in the drug store, emails about romance and reminders to celebrate love. And it can stir up things you weren’t expecting, or things you were hoping not to feel quite so intensely.
Maybe Valentine’s Day is one of those days for you.
You can feel crazy in love with your partner and grateful for your relationship, and at the same time feel sad, frustrated, or angry that your family doesn’t look the way you hoped it would by now..
It’s the and/both.
I remember miscarrying right before Christmas. The following year every special date carried quiet sadness and grief:
“I thought I’d be pregnant again by now.”
“My baby would have been (insert age) by now.”
“This would have been my due date.”
Those thoughts didn’t mean I wasn’t grateful for my life. They meant I was human.
So if Valentine’s Day feels complicated, know you’re not alone. And consider this:
Hold yourself with care.
Send yourself some love.
What would it feel like to give yourself a love note – literally or figuratively?
It might feel stretchy.
It might feel awkward.
It might even feel sweet.
Some ideas if you’d like them:
Write yourself a note and mail it – now or timed to arrive at a certain date. Or ask someone you trust to mail it for you.
Include words of encouragement.
Include words of gratitude.
Name what you’re proud of.
Acknowledge all that you are carrying or have carried.
Other love “notes” might look like this:
High five yourself in the mirror.
Look yourself in the eye in the mirror and say, “I love you”.
Write a thank-you letter to your body. Get detailed.
Write a letter from your body. What might it want you to know?
Or journal, using one of these prompts:
Three traits I love about myself…
I am really good at…
I feel strong when…
I’m grateful for…
There’s no right way to do this.
Just an invitation to meet yourself with a little more tenderness.
You deserve that kind of love, too.
If this love note stirred something and you’d like a little more support, I invite you to book a free fertility support session with me. It’s simply a space to talk, ask questions and feel less alone – no pressure,
xo,
Jennifer